IntroductionSay no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on “Why Violent Video Games Should Not Be Banned”? Get an Original Essay The following summary of traditional Chinese wedding customs has been prepared in response to questions from visitors to this site. This is in no way a scientific work and the author does not claim any particular expertise. Moreover, there were variations across the vast expanse of China – from region to region and even from village to village. Presumably, there were also significant differences reflecting the wealth and social status of the bride and groom. Thus, the following should be seen as only a composite of many variations of wedding rituals that were practiced in the past. A history of more than 2,400 years of traditions. The systematization of seemingly pre-existing elements of the traditional Chinese wedding ceremony is generally attributed to scholars of the Warring States period, 402-221 BC. Three venerable texts, The Book of Rites, The Book of Etiquette and Ceremonial, and the Baihu Tong describe the Three Covenants and Six Rites, considered necessary elements of a marriage. However, the ritual as a whole was so complicated that even during the Warring States period the etiquette underwent changes and simplification. What remains constant are the main objectives: to reunite and promote the two families and to ensure a succession with numerous descendants. Respect for parents and ancestors, omens encouraging fertility and wealth, financial and social obligations entered into by both families during the engagement, extensive gift etiquette, and the incorporation of the bride into her husband's family are recurring elements. Ancient Marriage Customs The Proposal The process began with an elaborate marriage proposal and its acceptance. This process was handled by an intermediary, who served as a buffer between the two parties – a role similar to that of a real estate agent today. The important parties in proposal and engagement negotiations were the parents of the bride and groom, rather than the bride and groom themselves. “Marriage aimed to perpetuate the ancestral lineage and create alliances between families; a duty too important to be left in the reckless hands of young people,” explains Costa. When the boy's parents identified a likely bride, they would send the intermediary to present gifts to the girl's parents and probe their feelings about marriage. If the proposal was well received, the intermediary obtained the date and time of the girl's birth recorded on a formal document. The groom's family placed this document on the ancestral altar for three days. If no bad omens, such as quarrels between parents or loss of property, occurred within this time, the parents passed the information to an astrological expert to confirm that the young woman and their son would be a good match. If the boy's family found the horoscope favorable, they would give the boy's date and time of birth to the intermediary to communicate to the girl's family, who would follow the same process. It was only after both results were favorable that the two families reunited. Finally face to face, each family evaluated the other in terms of appearance, education, character and social position. If both were satisfied, they would proceed with the engagement. The Betrothal First, the two sets of parents exchanged family identifying information as a token of intent. Then, after long negotiations, thetwo families came up with the amount of money and goods that would constitute the gift to the girl's family. After presenting the engagement tokens, the intermediary would ask the bride's family to choose from several auspicious wedding dates suggested by the boy's family and also set a date for the presentation of the engagement gifts. The boy's family presented betrothal gifts of money and important items such as tea, "Dragon (male) and Phoenix (female)" bridal cakes, pairs of male and female poultry, sweets and sugars, wines and tobacco, accompanied by a detailed statement of these gifts. Tea was such an important part of these gifts in some regions that they were known collectively as cha-li, meaning "gifts of tea." The girl's family reciprocated by offering her food and clothing. It was customary for the girl's family to distribute the bridal cakes they received from the boy's family to her friends and relatives as an announcement and invitation to the wedding feast. The number of cakes given to each person was established according to a rigid etiquette, depending on seniority and degree of intimacy. Those who received the bridal cakes were expected to present congratulatory gifts to the girl's parents. The gifts from the boy's family recognized the parents' efforts in raising the girl, and by accepting the gifts, the girl's family committed her to the boy. Interestingly, the bride was given to the family rather than to the groom alone. Even though the bride and groom had probably not yet met, the engagement was considered binding unless both families agreed to cancel the contract. A few days after the delivery of the engagement gifts, the girl's family sent porters with a dowry inventoried at the boy's house. The dowry consisted of practical objects, including a chamber pot, filled for the occasion with fruit and necklaces of coins. This procession gave the girl's family an opportunity to display both their social status and their love for their daughter, and wealthy parents often included serving girls to care for their daughter in her new home . Betrothals usually lasted a year or two, although child betrothals lasted until the children reached marriageable age. Wedding Preparations Rooster Retreat In anticipation of her imminent departure, the bride-to-be withdrew from ordinary routine and lived isolated in a separate part of the house with her closest friends. During this period, young women sang laments, mourning the bride's separation from her family and cursing the go-between, as well as the groom's family and even the girl's own parents. Since this long "night's sleep" often took place in the dovecote, the emergence of the bride on her wedding day was sometimes called "leaving the dovecote." Setting up the wedding bed The groom's preparation involved setting up the wedding bed the day before the wedding. An auspicious hour and a "lucky woman" or "lucky man", that is, a man or woman with many living children and spouses, was selected to install a newly purchased bed. (The installation ceremony consisted simply of moving the bed slightly; the actual work was done by servants or friends.) Once the bed was in place, children were invited onto the bed as an omen of fertility, the more one was crazy. For the same reason, the bed was strewn with red dates, oranges, lotus seeds, peanuts, pomegranates and other fruits. Part of the fun was watchingchildren rush to collect the fruits. Wedding Day The bride's "Hairdressing" ritual and the groom's "Hairdressing" ritual symbolized their initiation into adulthood and were important parts of the wedding preparations. Red, a symbol of joy, featured prominently in clothing and other ritual objects linked to marriage. The “hairstyle” ritual At dawn on her wedding day (or the day before), the bride bathed in water infused with pumelo, a variety of grapefruit, to purify her of bad influences; and it is suspected as a cosmetic to soften the skin in the manner of contemporary alphahydroxls. She put on new underwear and sat in front of lit dragon and phoenix candles. A “lucky woman” attended the wedding preparations. She spoke auspicious words while styling the bride's hair in the manner of a married woman. Once her hair was done, the bride came out of her retirement. She was carried to the main hall on the back of the lucky lady or her eldest sister-in-law. There, she put on a jacket and skirt and slipped on a pair of red shoes, placed in the center of a sieve. The bride's face was covered with either a red silk veil or a "curtain" of tassels or beads hanging from the bridal phoenix crown. (The photo below was taken at a mock wedding during a previous year's Chinese summer festival.) After completing her wedding preparations, the bride bowed to her parents and the ancestral tablets and waited for the arrival of the wedding procession from the groom's house. The “hairdressing” ritual Dressed in a long dress, red shoes and a red silk belt with a ball of silk on his shoulder, the groom knelt before the family altar while his father posed to him on the head a cap decorated with cypress leaves. The groom bowed first to the tablets of Heaven and Earth and his ancestors, then to his parents and the assembled family members. Her father removed the silk ball from the sash and placed it on the bride's sedan chair. The procession from the groom's house to get the bride The din of firecrackers, gongs and loud drums marked the start of the procession from the groom's house. The groom led the procession accompanied by a child as an omen of his future sons, and the bridal sedan chair was preceded by attendants with lanterns and streamers, musicians, and a "dancing" lion or unicorn. According to Hsiang: “Several decades ago, at a wedding in Fukien, the groom would go to the bride's house to pick her up, taking with him the bridal chair, completely covered in red satin and fresh flowers. He himself drove there and back in a blue and yellow teak sedan chair. “Arriving at the bride's house, the groom's group was greeted by the bride's friends, who did not want to 'give up' the bride until they were satisfied with red packets of money, said the groom's rep. This was the occasion for much good-natured haggling before the two parties were able to reach an agreement. In some cases, the groom would dine with the bride's family and receive a pair of chopsticks and two wine goblets wrapped in red paper, symbolic of the fact that he was receiving the family's joy in the person of their daughter. In some areas, he was offered sweet longan tea, two boiled eggs in syrup and transparent noodles. Another variation was for the groom to have soup with a boiled egg, from which he was supposed to break the yolk, which undoubtedly symbolized the break of the bride's ties with her family. Bridesmaid Games When the groom arrived at the bride's house, the groom's group waswelcomed by the bride's friends, who bargained with the groom or his representatives. They would make him do stunts or tricks, and wouldn't "return" their friend until they were satisfied with red wads of cash. The bride's journey to the groom's house The "lucky woman" or dajin, employed by the bride's family to care for the bride, carried the bride on her back to the sedan chair . Another attendant could protect the bride with a parasol while a third threw rice on the sedan chair. Sometimes the bride was transported in a wooden "cage" with her feet padlocked, probably a holdover from more difficult times when brides were extremely reticent. A sieve, shai-tse, which evacuated evil, and a metal mirror, king, which reflected light, were hung on the back of the bride's sedan to protect her from evil influences. The bride could also attach a special mirror to her garment, which she would not remove until she was safely seated on the marital bed. Firecrackers were set off to scare away evil spirits as the bride left in the sedan chair. The physical movement symbolized the transfer of the bride from her parents' family to that of her husband. Great care was taken to ensure that no harmful influences would affect the marriage. The maids who accompanied the bride to her new home were chosen with particular care so that the animals in the horoscope of their birth years were compatible with that of the groom. The sedan chair itself was covered with heavy curtains to prevent the bride from inadvertently spotting an unfortunate sight, such as a widow, a well, or even a cat. The servants scattered cereals or beans, symbols of fertility, in front of her. Arrival at the groom's house Once again, firecrackers were set off just before the arrival of the procession. A red carpet was placed in front of the sedan chair for the bride lest her feet touch the bare earth when she dismounted. The whole house would be waiting to receive it. The bride had to step over a saddle or a lit stove to cross the threshold, because the words for “saddle” and “tranquility” sound the same, ngan, and the fire would drive away bad influences. An attendant might immediately place a pile of rice in a sieve above or near the bride. If the bride was not wearing a lucky mirror, one could be used at that time to illuminate the bride. In some areas, a measure of grain and a series of copper coins were arranged as talismans of prosperity. After these rituals, the groom could finally lift the red scarf and see the bride's face. The Wedding Unlike the elaborate preparations, the wedding ceremony itself was simple. The bride and groom were led to the family altar, where they paid homage to Heaven and Earth, the family's ancestors and the God of Kitchen, Tsao-Chün. Tea, usually with two lotus seeds or two red dates in the cup, was offered to the groom's parents. Then the bride and groom greeted each other. This completed the marriage ceremony, except in some regions, where both also drank wine from the same goblet, ate sugar molded into the shape of a rooster, and participated in the wedding dinner together. Chinese Wedding Tea Ceremony Meaning of Tea Tea is probably used because it is the national drink of China and serving it is a sign of respect. Consuming tea is convenient because not everyone can drink alcohol. Lotus seeds and two red dates are used in tea for two reasons. First, the words "lotus" and "year", "seed" and "child", as well as "date" and ""early" are homophones, that is, they have the same sound but different meanings in Chinese. Second, the ancient Chinese believed that putting these foods in tea would help newlyweds have children early in their marriage and every year, ensuring their parents had many grandchildren. Also, the sweetness of the special tea is a wish for sweet relationships between the bride and her new family. Serving tea On the wedding day, the bride serves tea (holding the cup with both hands) to her parents at home before the groom arrives. She does this out of respect and to thank her parents for raising her. Tea at this time does not need lotus seeds or dates, and the bride does not need the help of a "lucky woman". She pours and serves the tea alone, without the groom. Traditionally, after the wedding ceremony, the newlyweds serve tea (holding the cups in both hands), inviting the groom's elders to drink tea by addressing them by a formal title, such as first uncle or third aunt. The general rule is to have the woman on the left side and the man on the right side. Those served will be seated on chairs, while the bride and groom will kneel. For example, when the newlyweds serve tea to the groom's parents, the bride kneels before her father-in-law, while the groom kneels before his mother. The newlyweds serve tea in order, starting with the groom's parents, then moving through the oldest members of the family to the youngest, for example the groom's parents, then his paternal grandparents , then his maternal grandparents, then his oldest aunts and uncles, and up to his older brother. In exchange, the newlyweds receive lucky red envelopes (“lai see”, meaning “lucky”) filled with money or jewelry. The helpers, who are usually women blessed with a happy or wealthy marriage and chosen by the fortune teller or mother of the bride, also receive lucky red envelopes filled with the money of those being served. These envelopes are placed on the tray which contains the teacups. The Bridal Chamber Immediately after the ceremony, the couple was taken to the bridal chamber, where both sat on the bed. In some regions, honey and wine were poured into two goblets connected by a red thread. The bride and groom took a few sips, then exchanged cups and drank it. On the day of the wedding (and sometimes for the next three days), the bedroom was open to visitors, who tended to tease the young couple with ribald remarks. Wedding Banquets Typically, separate wedding parties were organized by the parents of the bride and groom for their respective friends and families. Even at the party, men and women sat separately. There could be a single feast for each person or a series of feasts over several days. However, the most important celebration was the one given to the groom's family on the wedding day. This was generally seen as public recognition of the union. Chinese food has a particular symbolism: mainly wishes for happiness, longevity or fertility. The number of courses is also important. At a Chinese wedding banquet, eight courses are usually served, not including dessert. In Chinese, the word "eight" sounds like "good luck." (The words for "nine" and "long" are also homophones, words that are pronounced the same but have different meanings. At a birthday banquet, nine dishes are served with noodles at the end .) Nowadays, a wedding banquet begins with starters such as “dragon-phoenix” plates or cold plates consisting of various sliced ​​meats,jellyfish and various types of nuts shaped like dragons and phoenixes and served fresh. (Lobster in Chinese literally means "dragon shrimp" and in Chinese restaurants, chicken feet are called "phoenix feet"). In a marriage, the dragon symbolizes the masculine role while the phoenix symbolizes the feminine role. (See Chinese Wedding Traditions for additional use of dragon and phoenix symbolism.) This yin-yang dualism, opposing but not contradictory, is a key concept in Taoism according to Professor George Lee of San State University. Francisco. He and others believe that Taoism and yin-yang dualism are predominant in Chinese philosophy. Lee wrote that according to Black Sect Tantric Buddhism, “man and woman are one family – the tao of marriage.” Therefore, eating lobster and chicken for dinner would represent balance in the new relationship. Regarding the specific menu selections you mention: - Shark fin soup. Soup usually follows the starters. The type of soup has a certain meaning, for example, shark fin soup indicates wealth because this delicacy is very expensive. - Roast suckling pig. Roast pork is a symbol of virginity. (The groom presents a whole roasted pig to the bride's family at the engagement party.) – - Peking duck and lobster. Red is the color of happiness, so serving Peking duck and lobster would mean joy and celebration. In addition, serving the dish whole, that is to say with the head and legs, would symbolize completeness. – - Pigeon (or other poultry). According to Shu Shu Costa, the author of Wild Geese and Tea, the pigeon has tender meat which symbolizes peace. Usually, two pigeons are gifted to wish the newlyweds peace as they begin their new life together. - The pigeon (pigeon) is similar to the quail, so they both probably symbolize peace. The quail is offered whole to each guest so that everyone can also live a peaceful life. Serving fried chicken would wish the couple to have a good life because in Chinese “red chicken” sounds like “good life”. - Crab claws. If you want to serve crab, I suggest serving the whole crab and not just the claws, which are separated from the other parts. Since you will be serving lobster, I recommend substituting fried chicken for the crab claws because of my explanation above. – - A typical Chinese banquet usually includes chicken and duck. - Sea Cucumber Vegetables. Serving sea cucumber with vegetables is a sign of dealtruism because “sea cucumber” sounds like “good-hearted” and this dish wants the couple to think alike – to avoid conflict. - - Fish. Serving fish hopes that the couple will experience a life together in abundance, because "fish" sounds like "abundant" in Chinese. - The noodles served at the end would symbolize longevity because the noodles come in long strands. - Sweet soup with red beans and sweet rolls. Serving dessert probably wishes the newlyweds a sweet life. The hot, sweet red bean soup should contain lotus seeds (lian zi) and a bark-like vegetable (bak hop) to wish the newlyweds a hundred years of life together. - Sweet lotus paste in sweet steamed bread symbolizes fertility; its shape and color resemble peaches (ta zi), because the peach represents long life. The sticky dumpling you describe, covered in crushed peanuts with black sesame paste in the center, is called mochi. (You might consider lotus paste or red bean paste mochi for their symbolic value rather than black sesame paste.) At the end of the banquet, waiters usually hand out boxes.!